Life is such a journey. And so much of mine has been lived in fear. Especially when it comes to health. When I was 15 my father, who was barely 43, had a sudden and massive heart attack. In 15 seconds he was gone. By the time I was 37, I became an orphan after my mother’s vigorous seven-year cancer battle finally ended. With such odds, I felt like I should do as I did as a child: protect myself from the outside in. Being an appearance expert, I was able to use this as my own personal avoidance tactic.

But I made a promise to my mom in 2006. It was not a dying wish of hers. It was a birthday wish. It took me two years to honor this wish, but it is a wish fulfilled for her — and most of all me. I finally went to visit a doctor.

Helping people as I do, and because my own imperfections may be like a microcosm of the larger world around me, I have been working with a fantastic therapist for nearly the past two years since my mother passed. This amazing journey helped me see how much my deep connectedness to cultural Jewishness had contributed to certain ‘holding patterns’ in my behavior.

I would hold on to the feelings of victimization, old aggravations, grudges, and especially fears. This year has been all about conquering deeply personal fears and visiting the doctor to get a baseline on my health was facing the final frontier of my fears.

Fortunately, the news was hopeful. The cholesterol needs to be improved, but it can be done – my doctor thinks – by continuing with my good diet, and improved exercise. In fact, all ready in just 18 days since first visiting my doctor, I dropped five pounds. He wants me to drop a total of 27 pounds. I stand just 5’4″. Losing this weight is going to be very noticeable. In fact, just losing the five pounds has all ready made a physical difference.

My (Jewish) doctor told me I had an ‘Ashkenazic belly’. I think he probably didn’t realize just how much those words affected me given all the personal work I’ve done over these last two years. No longer did I want to feel like I was waiting for my personal Holocaust to begin. When would my heart attack happen? When would my bad news come? This is simply no way to live. So Ashkenazic belly be gone.

Several years ago, while living in Dallas, I faithfully worked out with a fantastic personal trainer named Rod Hensley. Rod always wanted me to keep up on cardio exercise, which I always felt was boring. I just wanted to train with weights. But now I see the value of cardio training more than ever. I remember having a conversation with a Jewish guy who knew I was working out with a trainer. He was a lawyer and was an avid golfer, as I recall. He made a comment then I never forgot. He said, “Jews aren’t supposed to have abs”.

And this brings me to the moral of this post. No matter what negative stuff you’ve been told in the past, let it go. If you’ve stored this kind of information for any reason, it should now be used for some positive purpose. I truly do believe in a holistic approach to self image improvement. But this approach does involve the entire body, inside and out. So I’m following my own advice, and hope you’ll do just the same. I’m going to get some Ashkenazic abs!

Designing your image is the secret science to your success.

Joseph Rosenfeld helps professional men and corporate workgroups create effective visual brands. Visit JosephRosenfeld.com for details.