I formally declare war on all mainstream media that is trying to feminize men’s bodies! And you should, too.
If you haven’t read the Wall Street Journal’s December 4th article, “More Men Have Something They Want to Get Off Their Chests – Their Shirts,” you should, so you know where I’m coming from. It reads like chest hair and pectoral muscles on men are the things of spicy scandal – like men either aren’t supposed to be manly and virile any more, or need to restrict the look of their virility. Apparently a little bit of spice goes a long, long way.
What is scandalous to me is the introduction of new sexist terminology like the word, “heavage,” used to describe the new “male cleavage” popping out of unbuttoned tight fitting, body conforming and low-cut knits worn by physically fit men. Apparently a man’s very fit physique and hairy chest are possible no-nos for plenty of women, including those reporting on these trends in the media today, plus the purported inventor of this term, Britain’s Daily Telegraph fashion director.
The issue of chest hair has certainly furrowed my eyebrows with this and other recent articles. I mean, honestly, either a man’s got it or not; and if he’s got it he’s got the choice to trim it or wax it or leave it be. Another image consultant [not me] saying it’s better if a man has “a little chest hair,” is analogous to following a recipe instructing the cook to remove a pot from the heat just prior to boiling. When exactly do you know that will happen? How does one know what measurement “a little chest hair” really is? Why can’t a guy decide what’s acceptable for him and have his other half be supportive of his personal choice? Why degrade a guy for having a body the way the Universe created him?
I work with my clients and guide them to positive solutions so they never feel ashamed of their natural physicality. Women often meet hairy-chested men with disapproving looks. But I don’t rush clients to appointments with estheticians. Wearing the right kind of clothing at the right time and place usually takes care of everything when men are out in public. The rest is a private, personal matter.
Subliminal advertising and messaging commonly depict men in feminized ways. The mainstream media fuels this fire by referring to “male décolletage,” a term blurring gender lines, as the term with French roots regularly refers to a woman’s breasts. The messages running amuck in the media are not the least bit amusing, as men receive many mixed messages and don’t quite know how to please those we intend to please while trying to please ourselves by feeling good, looking good, and being healthy.
Take a look at this provocative ad. I show it in a workshop educating fellow image consultants about why men need our professional expertise. I’ve been highly criticized for showing this piece of highly sexualized advertising. You can’t even tell what they’re advertising because it’s all in the fine print at the bottom of the page. [For the record, it’s an ad to have photo images like these sent to your phone on behalf of Armani Exchange. It seems like a “sexting,” campaign aimed at a particular target audience, n’est ce pas?] But there are clear messages being conveyed in this ad, ripped literally from the pages of GQ magazine. It shows a sexually aggressive young woman about to have her way with a very thin young man, who appears boyish, smooth, and almost feminine.
Now keep in mind this ad is from GQ magazine, where 75% of the readers are MEN! This is a visual message marketers want men to receive about the way they see that men should be. And my point is that this is not a healthy message for men! Men have come a long way in evolving and redefining their roles in society. But being driven by these “forces of change” in the media are not positive motivation for most mainstream men, leading to psychological issues like body dysmorphic disorder and eating disorders, like bulimia.
I’ll continue to speak out against these images and messages on behalf of men everywhere, and I’ll willingly take the heat for provoking thought. A hairy-chested, beer-drinking “average guy” doesn’t want his chest referred to as “heavage,” and he doesn’t identify with images like this one. I’m drawing a line in the sand right here and now: it’s time to stop feminizing men and our bodies.
Designing and managing your image is the secret science of your success.
Joseph Rosenfeld helps professional men, women, and corporate workgroups create effective visual brands. Visit JosephRosenfeld.com for details.
It's a very interesting concept to watch as the word flips. I was recently talking to Pat O’Connell about how the Feminist movement means something different to my generation then it had to his, despite that he is only 15 years older than me. We have gone to the opposite in so many ways, we meant to keep women from being treated like this so NO ONE would be, and now we are treating men exactly how we asked to stop being treated. I'm sure it is cause for many of our young men to become anorexic and has done nothing to actually help women in the process. Good blog Joseph!
Great Blog Joseph. Women have put up with this for years (Truly, what has sex got to do with selling beer, for example?), & I too have been noticing how companies are using men in similar ways. I honestly hadn't though about the feminization part of men, so thanks for that insight. I'm one who has always enjoyed a man with hair (a la Tom Selleck!), so I agree that men (and women) would be better off enhancing what they have rather than making themselves into something they are not. The bigger picture, though, as you point out, is that much of the time we cannot even tell what is being advertised as all we see is a sexually charged photo. Not necessary. Let's have a simple, straightforward ad without furthering image insecurities