It’s the end of a year most of us would describe as ‘tough’. Regardless of how one would characterize one’s circumstances, it’s blatantly obvious to onlookers when today’s current cultural malaise translates into pure sloppiness on individuals everywhere.

A concern friends share is about being judged negatively by my discerning eyes when we get together for dinner or for an event. I insist that unless they’ve engaged me, I’m not there to pass judgment. While this is true, it is also true that if people are in my line of vision, I am going to have a look! It’s a curiosity of mine to see how people present themselves to the world.

Why is it that a woman finds it acceptable to carry a great bag while the rest of her outfit is in shambles? Somehow the bag makes up for the disaster she’s wearing? When I observe this combination, it makes me immediately question whether the bag is even real. It may be a totally unfair characterization, but if I’m questioning this as a professional, think of the numerous average people affected by the very same impression.

Just back from vacation on the Hawaiian island of Maui, a place where dressing casually is customary, I was hardly surprised that even the finest restaurants on the island do not require formal attire. While staying in the luxurious Wailea area, it was easy to spot countless women who forgot all about putting themselves together for their $150 per person dinners but they managed to drag out their designer handbags. But where were their coordinating shoes? What about their outfits? With all the spas and salons in every hotel property, it was inexcusable to see so many women turn out for a chic presentation of cuisine without looking a bit chic – albeit still casual – themselves.

And the men! If the women are having so many image issues, you know the men are not far behind. There are fewer obvious resources available to men. The silk print short sleeve shirts of a ubiquitous fashion seem to fit overweight men better than they are attractive or stylish for nearly any man. Men need to do a bit of work to individualize themselves, but once they do a little ‘style soul searching’ (perhaps even with my expert help) they’ll be able to even travel to Maui looking casual and chic when it’s appropriate to show up that way.

There are many times in our day to day lives when just showing up is not enough. Put effort into showing up appropriately, and enhance your social experiences.

Designing your image is the secret science to your success.

Joseph Rosenfeld helps professional men and corporate workgroups create effective visual brands. Visit JosephRosenfeld.com for details.